“You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.”
If there’s one thing I want people to remember about me, it is the fact that I found joy in my Jesus.
I want them to hardly be able to picture me without a smile.
I want them to remember me when my dreams seem to be crushed to pieces and I can still smile through the tears and say that He lives, the first and last hope of my soul.
Sisters, I have to stop this rolling on and on of my self-pursuit. My own schedule, my own dreams, my own agenda.
You have to stop it too.
Many of you girls know me. You know that I’m not very shy, and those of you that really know me have seen me with tears in my eyes as I share a passion of my soul.
If I could invite you over right now and sit on my bed with you, we’d both wrap up in quilts and you could tell me about the hurt and I could tell you how I’ve been there too. I could tell you that Jesus was there.
He’s the reason I can breathe and say that it’s okay. He’s the source of strength for the next smile that hard to come by or the next tongue-biting when I really want to stab back.
So why do I forget?
Why do you forget?
I know you, my sisters. You struggle and cry and forget. Every moment, you forget.
But it has to be different, because we are the light of the world.
A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.
God just may have to clear away all our underbrush of forgetting and self-seeking before the world says, “I want what she has.”
Do you know what? I’m sitting here pecking the keyboard and I don’t know how to finish. Because I am so scared to wake up again tomorrow with another day of forgetfulness.
Sisters, let us draw near to the throne of grace. It is only there that we will find the strength for that other-worldly smile when the day is slamming against our nerves.
What does He say? He promises that He is faithful and will not give us more than we can bear—with His strength, that is.
As I write you now, I plead with myself. Shelbie, don’t forget. Shelbie, cling to Him.
I can’t do it on my own. And neither can you. Haven’t I tried—haven’t we all?
I type more slowly, glance at the clock, see that I have only one minute to finish and crawl into bed. But the soul-intensity is there and I wonder if it will be gone when I wake up tomorrow.
I’m praying for you, sisters. Pray for me. Pray that God’s grace would fill me and His joy would flow from my smile.
Because I’m broken tonight on my own.
One of my favorite hymns is this:
“Take my life, and let it be, consecrated, Lord, to Thee. Take my moments and my days. Let them flow in ceaseless praise.”
“Let them flow in ceaseless praise.”
And the light will not be able to hide.